I have decided to upload a creative writing story that I wrote so that I can get some more posts.
This story is about a guy named Billy Cole Wagner. Now Billy isn’t the sharpest knife in the drawer, or the brightest bulb on the tree because all he did was buy video game money. But before we get into all of that, let’s give you the details of him. He is a 58 year old man who likes to wear size 21 high heeled red shoes. Everyone but his mom is dead so he lives in her basement. He is a single, 5ft 7 man with long gray hair, blue eyes, and ragged clothes. The only nice things that he owns are an iPhone 6+, and beats headphones. The reason everything is so beat up is because he only spends his money on video game money. His job is panhandling on the street, and his mom is too busy working to kick him out of the house. Also he is a lazy, boring, and clumsy. He doesn’t take any better care of himself than he does of his possessions. He doesn’t have a favorite food, he likes anything that he can find that’s edible, also he has never read a book on his own, and all his habits are bad ones. People think of him as a lazy bum, but he has one secret. He did the laundry, took out the trash, and bought food…….once. So as you can see, not too bright.
Finally one day Billy’s mom had had enough. She said that she had calculated how much rent he owed her after living there for 33 years after she said he needed to leave. The grand total of his rent was $336,600. She said that he needed to leave in 2 weeks and pay the money otherwise she would take away his phone. So Billy needed a job. He got help on a resume, printed it, and went to jobs he was interested in.
This was his resume:
Hi! I am Billy Cole Wagner.
I am 58 years old and looking for a job.
I like to play on my phone and do stuff.
I am a sort of experienced pan handler and other than that I don’t have experience.
HIRE ME!!!
The interviewer looked at the resume, and then asked “so can you give me an idea of what you think about working in I.T.?” And Billy said “what’s I.T.?” The interviewer then asked “what do you think is appropriate for hours and wages?”
“$336,600 an hour for one hour.”
“Get out.”
So after that failure he then decided that he would become a piolet and he would take a flying lesson.
After the plane exploded and he floated down to the ground, on the only parachute that the piolet would have used to save them both, he left and decided to sell his parachute. He then used the money, which was $100,000, half on his phone and half on lottery tickets. The then got a billion dollar winner, paid back his mom, and then bought a house and life essentials. With the money that was left he decided to split it 50/50. 50% went to the bank in a savings account, and the rest to his in game money.
The End